Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
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