i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
We have so much sex to catch up on
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Randomize