hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
