They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
