i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
