I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
