Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
