Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
