A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
