We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I need to align my fucking chakras
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
