I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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