I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Randomize
