The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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