I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize