I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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