nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
