Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
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