Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
