Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
