he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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