Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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