Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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