How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
