is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
