Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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