I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
