Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize