I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
