I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize