My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
