Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
