i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
