Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
