so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
