Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
