I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
