Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
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