Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
