I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
i think im in europe. pls send help
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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