i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
