ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Someone signed my nipple.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
