By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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