Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We got so high we made milksteak
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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