How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
We have started to decorate penises.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize