Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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