how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I just got carded by a ten year old.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
