Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
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