wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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