ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
