i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I wear drunk well.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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