That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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