Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
