I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
She's not a foreskin expert like you
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
